Husbands, Jesus and Wives
“Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.”
— 1 Peter 3.7
How would you describe Peter? Sissy? Effeminate? Soft voice and tender hands? Not hardly. Peter was a M-A-N. Peter was a leather-necked, fisherman. Peter acted like a man and in his rough voice he says, “Husbands—listen up!”
First, husbands are to live with their wives in an understanding way. Paul said, “Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them” (Colossians 3.19). Husbands, do not speak to your wives as though they were men. Men speak to men in a blunt way, but husbands should speak to their wives in a softer tone. Why? The woman is the weaker vessel. Men are like hammers. You can slam hammers against things and they don’t break.
Conversely, many women are porcelain tea cups. You can slam a porcelain tea cup against the wall, but it will break. We can see this distinction in little boys and girls. If a young boy gets mad about something, he turns green and runs into a wall. He gets up and he is fine. How does a girl react if she gets mad? She may cry, but she will never run into a wall.
Second, husbands should show honor to their wives. Paul says, “Outdo one another in showing honor” (Romans 12.10). Honoring your wife means listening to her.
Finally, Peter says that husbands should live with their wives in an understanding way or else their “prayers may be hindered.” Here is the heart of the matter. Your prayers will be hindered because you don’t understand the gospel of Jesus Christ. What is the gospel of Jesus Christ? Simply put: “For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast” (Ephesians 2.8-9). Both of you are saved by grace. You have no right to belittle her. To be sure, husbands and wives have different roles, but you are saved the same way. Paul said, “there is no male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus” (Galatians 3.28).
Jesus sternly speaks to husbands and says, “You are a nobody, little boy! You think you are a big bad man, but you were helpless and weak and you couldn’t save yourself. I had to save you.” At the same time, Jesus looks into your eyes and says, “I honored you by dying for you. Show honor to her.” Why? Because both of you “are children of God, and if children, then heirs—heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ…” (Romans 8.16-17). We all put on our salvation pants on the same way—by grace. Husbands, honor your wives.